Thank you, Peter Brady!

Can you imagine I almost didn’t post this blog for fear I was sharing too much information?  I laugh at the thought now, wondering to myself, “Have you read your blog?”  The fear of T.M.I. has never stopped me before.  Why start now?  So, here it goes.  It happened.  Rather, the issue is that it didn’t happen.  You may be thinking, “What the heck are you talking about?” 

It’s confirmed.  I’m going through the change. The big “M.” The mid-life rite of passage. The dreaded time women call MENOPAUSE!  There, I said it.  This past week was my first missed period.  Spoiler alert - I’m NOT pregnant.  I spent my life regular as rain and honestly, it freaked me out a little.  I didn’t expect it to have this impact on me.  Don’t ask me why.  Ever since I memorized the pages of “Are you there, God?  It’s me Margaret,” I certainly thought I would be in complete celebration of this moment.  But I’m not.  I surprisingly feel a little sad.

Proof God has a sense of humor, the song He placed on my heart for the last several days is, “Time to Change” by The Brady Bunch.  In case you’re wondering, it’s just as annoying as getting “It’s a Small World After All” stuck in your head.  What the heck?!  What does a song about a young boy going through puberty have to do with this situation?  Seriously?

One Google search on the “M” word will send a streak of pure fear into the bravest of souls.  The endless list of potential side effects is enough to spiral a full-blown panic attack.  I’m making a conscious deliberate choice to ignore all of that.  I’m trying to focus on the good.  If Judy Blume taught me anything through Margaret’s journey, it’s all women go through this.  I know I’m not alone.

Instead of power surging hot flashes, mind numbing mood swings, dry wrinkling skin, graying hair, and a foggy fuzzy brain, I am going to try to focus on the positive aspects.  It did take me a while to figure out what they actually are, but I am finding my voice, and I feel way more confident.  I’m going to make a conscious attempt to remember this when I can’t remember what I’m saying, in the midst of saying it, and I feel like I’m emotionally losing my mind. 

Women report coming through this on the other side stronger and wiser than before.  I hold onto that.  I think what bothers me the most is how quickly life is going by.  This feels so “end of life.”  Maybe it’s the menopausal brain being a bit dramatic here, but it feels like I’ll blink and another decade will have passed.  I’m not ready for that.  I haven’t experienced all of the many extreme symptoms yet.  I trust that living a healthy lifestyle, keeping my weight in check, and working out will ease the situation.  But I do have a fear of what may be coming.  That’s why I decided to write about it and share this part of my journey. 

This week God has helped me face what’s happening.  I choose to bravely walk through menopause because this is the way God designed us.  The aging process, including menopause, is not to be feared, and we have the assurance that God’s grace is sufficient to get us through whatever life throws at us.  The Bible tells us, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” (2 Corinthians 12:9) I plan to take my menopausal anxieties and fears to the Lord in prayer.  I will seek His guidance, wisdom and strength.  I intend to be a menopausal overcomer!  “Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.”  (1 Peter 5:7)

This is life and signifies the passage of time.  It’s a fresh new chapter.  Change can be scary, and unpredictable, but never easy.  Sometimes change is a choice and sometimes it’s out of our control.  One of the hardest lessons with change is letting go.  It’s time to let go of my past and time to let go of my youth as I knew it.  It’s time to accept the change knowing this season is for a reason.  Sometimes change is painful, sometimes it’s beautiful, but most of the time it’s both. Maybe that’s the lesson for me.  Stay present in the now and not take this process for granted.  It’s part of my story. 

It’s human nature to veer automatically to the negative and worse case scenarios anytime there’s change.  I’m choosing to heed the advice of Peter Brady.  “When it’s time to change you have to rearrange who you are and what you’re gonna be.”  Thank you, Peter Brady.  Your annoying song reminded me this week that it’s not the end but a new beginning. 

Results for the week: -1.2 lbs lost; Total Lost: 39.0

D.O.W. = 517; Starting weight: 182.0; Current weight: 143.0

(Days on the Wagon = Days of food sobriety - no sugar pig-outs!) 

Click here to hear the song!

Autumn turns to winter
And then winter turns to spring
It's not just for the seasons you know
It goes for everything

It's even true for voices when boys begin to grow
You gotta take a lesson from mother nature
And if you do you'll know

When it's time to change, then it's time to change
Don't fight the tide, come along for the ride
Don't ya see?
When it's time to change, you've got to rearrange
Who you are into what you're gonna be

Day by day it's hard to see
The changes you've been through
A little bit of living, a little bit of growing
All adds up to you

Every boy's a man inside
A girl's a woman too
And if you want to reach your destiny
Here's what you've got do

When it's time to change, then it's time to change
Don't fight the tide, come along for the ride
Don't ya see?
When it's time to change, you've got to rearrange
Who you are into what you're gonna be

When it's time to change, you've got to rearrange
Who you are into what you're gonna be