Sisterhood Of The Traveling Fat Pants
What does it feel like to drop off a trunk full of fat pants at the Goodwill? It’s supposed to feel thrilling, a huge accomplishment, like I finally did it, and that I’m burning the boat! This week Oliver and I made that very trip to the Goodwill. I handed the woman several bags of pants. These bags contained all of the sizes I grew into on the way up, and all of the sizes I shrunk back into on the way down. Initially, I felt all of those amazing things! But then, ever so slowly, that inner negative voice softly beckoned me. “What are you doing? You’ve done this before and had to buy all new pants again! What if? Are you sure about this? You’ve never kept the weight off before. Didn’t you learn your lesson the last time?”
Truthfully, I’ve been traveling around with several of these bags for weeks. Some of the larger sizes were in my trunk for months. My strong inner blog voice finally won the battle saying, “Practice what you’ve been preaching, sister! You’re either in, or you're in the way!” This week’s question may be one of the most important of this journey. How can I make certain I’m not going to repeat the fat pants buy-back pattern again?
This time is completely different from all previous weight loss, wellness, lifestyle changes, and fad diet quests. This time God is at the center. This week, during my quiet time of focus and prayer, one word keeps appearing on my heart, “Humility.” I kept hearing, “Humility, and the importance of humility in recovery, is the answer.” What? I was pretty confused hearing the answer to my fat pants fear is humility. What does that even mean? I set out this week to find out.
What does it look like to be a humble person? According to several of my scientific researched google dictionary searches, the definition of a person displaying humility is one who acts, “stable, steady, calm, patient, open-minded, nonjudgmental, temperate, and realistic.” Humility can mean different things to different people, but I feel it refers to modesty and respectfulness. It’s the opposite of arrogance. When we’re being humble, it means that we accept our own limitations and weaknesses. It also means we have a realistic understanding of our own strengths. Myles Munroe says it best. “Humility is simply believing and accepting what God says about us, and God says that we are anything but worthless.” This time I’m treating this journey for what it truly is for me, an addiction to food and sugar. The more I learn, the more I realize how much I don’t know. Years ago, I think I felt a bit of arrogance and pride when I hit my goal weight. I thought I had the answers, and somehow discovered the secret key. I thought I cracked the code. I took my success for granted. The truth is, I clearly didn’t have any answers at all then, and I still don’t have them now. This time, all I know for sure, is that it’s entirely in God’s hands, and He does have all of the answers.
The last time I wore these skinny pants I never treated this as an addiction. I knew what to eat, and how much, but I never treated the why. So, when the going got tough, this unhealed emotional eater got growing. I never focused on the emotional side of things at all. Back in 1935, Bill Wilson, the cofounder of Alcoholics Anonymous said, “The attainment of greater humility is the foundation principle of each of the AA’s twelve steps. Without some degree of humility, no alcoholic can stay sober at all.” Bill expands his definition of humility saying, “It’s the clear recognition of what and who we really are, followed by a sincere attempt to be what we can be.” I feel the healing principles of the AA program were divinely inspired. I also believe the basic principles of the steps can apply to all sorts of addictions and afflictions in life, including eating issues. Bill goes on to carefully point out that the essence of all humility in the 12 steps is, “The desire to seek and do God’s will.”
So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor.
1 Peter 5:6 NLT
Pride hides and humility seeks. Proverbs 18:12 says, “Before a downfall the heart is haughty, but humility comes before honor.” Hiding precedes our downfall. Humility confesses weakness. Pride keeps us from asking God for help. Pride prevents us from believing God is there to help us, and that He will help us. Proverbs 11:2 says, “When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom.” Thomas Merton said, “Pride makes us artificial and humility makes us real.” I try so hard to keep it real this time around. There are no more secrets. I put it all out there, maybe a little too much. I may share too much information, but light brings truth into the darkness, which sets you free. I know I can’t do it alone.
This week I realized that humility is a choice. It’s not denying your strengths but accepting your weakness. Pride is when I accept the credit for what God did through me. I accepted the credit the last time I hit my goal, thinking God wasn’t really involved. Oh, how wrong I was! This time I realize God has everything to do with it. EVERYTHING! Pastor Rick Warren said, “Be humble or you’ll stumble. Pride destroys and humility builds up.” It’s that simple. The Bible says, “For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted” (Matthew 23:12 NIV). True healing begins with a humble heart. I believe, no matter what our goals are in life, it starts with a humble heart. Sinclair Ferguson said, “Humility is not simply feeling small and useless – like an inferiority complex. It is sensing how great and glorious God is, and seeing myself in that light.”
It feels good to no longer travel with a trunk full of fat pants, taunting me of past failures. They hold no power over me. I’m free of the pants. This time God is there with me. This time I don’t have to be perfect. This time I’m real about when I struggle. This time I’m trying to help others on their journey by being real about my journey. This time I seek to do God’s will. This time I know I’m not alone. Marianne Williamson said, “Something very beautiful happens to people when their world has fallen apart: a humility, a nobility, a higher intelligence emerges at just the point when our knees hit the floor.”
This week I realized that humility is a choice. It’s not denying your strengths but accepting your weakness. Pride is when I accept the credit for what God did through me. I accepted the credit the last time I hit my goal, thinking God wasn’t really involved. Oh, how wrong I was! This time I realize God has everything to do with it. EVERYTHING! Pastor Rick Warren said, “Be humble or you’ll stumble. Pride destroys and humility builds up.” It’s that simple. The Bible says, “For those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves will be exalted” (Matthew 23:12 NIV). True healing begins with a humble heart. I believe, no matter what our goals are in life, it starts with a humble heart. Sinclair Ferguson said, “Humility is not simply feeling small and useless – like an inferiority complex. It is sensing how great and glorious God is, and seeing myself in that light.”
It feels good to no longer travel with a trunk full of fat pants, taunting me of past failures. They hold no power over me. I’m free of the pants. This time God is there with me. This time I don’t have to be perfect. This time I’m real about when I struggle. This time I’m trying to help others on their journey by being real about my journey. This time I seek to do God’s will. This time I know I’m not alone. Marianne Williamson said, “Something very beautiful happens to people when their world has fallen apart: a humility, a nobility, a higher intelligence emerges at just the point when our knees hit the floor.”
Comments