Five Seconds of Quirky
This journey has been a learning process for me in finding out what works for me while I seek out tools and tips to help myself on this path. The intention of the blog is to share what I uncover about myself and what I find that works. Some of my discoveries seem to be common sense but are often things we don't consciously think about. This latest discovery, I'm not gonna lie, is pretty quirky! Frankly speaking, it will sound very stupid and you will think I've perhaps lost my mind, but stay with me. I have been working with this concept the past few weeks to make sure it was for real and not a bunch of mumbo-jumbo wackiness. I absolutely think it's pretty stupid but for some reason I think there's something here.
When the student is ready, the teacher appears!
I can't even begin to describe how I came across this book or the author. It started with a podcast, leading to a YouTube video and yet another podcast that led to Mel Robbins' book "The 5 Second Rule." Now, I'm not talking about eating dirty food that's barely touched the ground, this is about taking action. The concept is taking action on the little things is a complete game changer on the big things. This idea is based on when you think of doing something your brain can and will talk you out of it in 5 seconds. Mel was having problems just getting out of bed in the morning when her alarm would sound. It's a long story but things in her life were a mess and she was in a bad place. She would hit the snooze over and over, unable to get out of the depression and rut that had overtaken her life. One evening she saw a rocket launch on TV and she heard the count down, five- four- three- two- one- BLAST OFF! On a hunch she thought that the next morning she was going to do that to get herself out of bed. She even admits it was so very stupid but it worked!
Upon researching this concept she found that the bad habits, and our ability to easily talk ourselves out of doing things we don't want to do, runs on a loop in the back part of our brain. She also discovered scientific evidence to support the front part of the brain, that we use to make decisions, only needs 5 seconds for it to change your mind. Consciously counting backwards, "Five-four-three-two-one - DO IT", tricks your brain into focusing on something else and doing the action before you have a chance to change your mind. The counting gets you to focus on the goal and not the worrying thoughts that are trying to talk you out of it. Her book is compelling and makes total sense. Mel says, "The moment you have an impulse to act on a goal you must push yourself to move within 5 seconds or the brain will kill it."
This tool can help in everyday moments of difficulty, uncertainty and fear. It can also be used to combat procrastination by helping us be courageous and step out of our comfort zone. Mel describes in her book that we can't control how we feel about something but we can control how we act; it's all a choice. The countdown within the first five seconds gets you to take action and not think about how you feel about something, like what to eat or to workout. You are not battling your ability to stick to a diet. You are battling your feelings about sticking to it! Just thinking about what you want won't make it happen without action. The rule can also apply to those times you start to feel anxiety or stress. You can use the five second rule to change your thoughts to focus on something else. You can apply the rule to speaking up in front of others, or having the conversation that needs to happen, but you are trying to avoid.
There's an earlier blog post about why I eat when not hungry. One of the main issues I discovered was wanting to reach for food when I was trying to avoid doing something I didn't want to do and the urge to eat would go away when I would just do it. I also want to reach for food when I'm feeling something I don't want to feel. Intuitively I feel this concept can help. I told you this was quirky! But I also said I would give it a go before sharing this idea on my blog. So, does it work? Here's a run down of my experiences this past week to find out.
Putting the tool to use:
Last Saturday a neighbor friend, who follows my blog, sent a text saying she was going to do a full body workout in her back yard and invited me to join. I literally just got done working out for an hour already and we still had to prepare our outdoor stuff for the hurricane heading our direction. There was still plenty of time. I was busy coming up with excuses to not go. I looked at her text, knowing this would be good for me, and five-four-three-two-one- SAY YES; TEXT HER BACK. And I did.
Monday the hurricane is passing through, which was just a tropical storm and not that bad for us, thank God. We still had power and all was well. Dan wanted to go workout at the neighborhood fitness center first thing in the morning. I was talking myself out of going with him and into going later in the day which could have led to not going at all. Before I had a chance to completely talk myself out of it I five-four-three-two-one- YES, I'LL GO WORKOUT WITH YOU. And I did.
Tuesday evening I was telling myself I wanted a Larabar snack, although it's healthy, I wasn't even hungry. We just ate dinner less than an hour prior. I realized I was so very tired but it was barely 8PM; I could see what was happening here. I five-four-three-two-one-GO TO BED. And I did.
Driving to work Thursday morning I started to think about my Dad and started to feel really sad. I was having visions of the very last moments of his life and could feel myself tearing up. I five-four-three-two-one- THINK OF A HAPPY TIME. And I did. I suddenly had a vision of him playing his trumpet to his big band records in our living room of the house I grew up in. My sisters and I were dancing around to the music. It made me feel happy and grateful to have such beautiful memories instead of feeling overwhelming sadness.
Friday afternoon I needed to go the workout room to workout. It's been such a long week and I was utterly exhausted. I started to talk myself out of working out with the thoughts that I've been so good all week. I five-four-three-two-one- PUT ON YOUR SHOES AND GO. And I did.
I warned you that this rule is extremely quirky; it is so simple but it works! I know I'm not going to always feel like doing the things I need to do to reach the result I want, but I have to do those things if I want to reach my goals. It's obvious that emotions are one of the biggest triggers of our habits, especially for me. This tool seems to have the ability to truly help when I'm about to derail from a lack of courage. Things in your life can change five seconds at at time. The five second rule is like getting a Moonstruck slap in the face. The five second rule is an immediate SNAP OUT OF IT! And you will.
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